As you can see from the image of the Dawson Bridge (after the jump), there’s some serious constructing taking place right now. And the level of seriousness of the construction is directly correlated with the amount of scaffolding currently residing on the bridge. Scaffolding is a tremendous invention. My roommate, who owns a paving company and used to work in construction, told me that scaffolding can be built up to six stories before it needs to be bolted into something (otherwise it falls over). I don’t think quite so much is needed for Ol’ Dawsy, but as you can see from the picture, there’s a lot of it.
Now, in order to assess the progress of construction crews on this project, I decided to contact the city directly. And sure, I was asking some tough questions. But they were important ones. Unfortunately, city officials were rather, uh, selective in their responses. Here’s what I asked them:
- So, how close was the Dawson Bridge to falling into the North Saskatchewan before the city started the rehab project?
- Are you currently on schedule to complete the project so the bridge can re-open in January 2011?
- What are you guys working on on the bridge right now for the month of the April?
- Can we expect the bridge to look very similar to its original form, or or has the city added lasers and other random, but extremely cool, technology?
- To your knowledge, has anyone tried to cross the North Saskatchewan river beside the bridge in protest of its closure? If so, did the construction guys take some video I can upload to YouTube?
- Do you one day hope that robots will be able to do this kind of work, while you boss them around and sip lemonade? Or would you be worried about some kind of robot revolt?
- Is anyone planning a huge bridge opening party? Other than me?
See? This is why I’m one of 52% of bloggers who lies to others and instead tells everyone he’s a journalist. BECAUSE I ASK THE HARD QUESTIONS.
Unfortunately, the city wasn’t forthcoming in its answers, which is why yet another Potential Bridge Conspiracy® is apparently upon us. Here were the responses I received:
- Bridge construction continues on schedule; at this point, we anticipate completion and re-opening by end the of 2010.
- We will likely hold a media event to showcase the bridge once it is finished so that Edmontonians can see the work that has been done.
- In April, crews will begin removing the old bridge deck in preparation for the replacement of this portion of the structure.
- When the bridge is complete, it will have been repainted the same colour and the only change in appearance will be the wider sidewalks (they will still be made of wood in order to preserve the look and character of the bridge).
See? They just sidestepped the robot/laser questions. Clearly, these individuals have had media training.
And OBVIOUSLY the city is covering up its desire to use robots to build bridges. Clearly someone at the city has seen Battlestar Galactica. The whole premise of that show is based on the notion that robot workers — some of whom may have been enlisted to build fictional bridges — revolted against their masters. It turned into an all-out war. And it really is a terrific series, you should watch it…
The city doesn’t want us to know this. Because they don’t want the resident of the quiet community of Riverdale to know the robot apocalypse is going to be fought on its doorstep — on top of a newly renovated bridge, I might add.
Just further evidence that the city’s squandering our tax dollars. I hope there’s an election soon.